But you'll remember most about those who gave you the best memories ones. Despite of whatever type of memories, bitter or sweet. They just seem like a part of your life.
Sometimes, you just wish they leave together with the memories. But, it's just reality that memories will be remembered, till it actually fades.
Have you ever loved someone till you don't even know what you're actually doing for him? Not even if it's benefiting him or not. And you tell yourself that he'll understand the way you treat him, love him, care for him. But the truth is, he doesn't even know if you're even caring for him or not. When things goes wrong and he starts to think that you're not treating him right, he'll accuse you for ignoring him and blaming everything on you. Yet, you still love him that much.
What kind of love is it? Say that I'm brainless, I couldn't deny. Say that I'm only thinking positive, I couldn't deny. Say that I'm escaping, I couldn't deny too.
And now that he left, I hope he's doing good. Although I think I am, but I'm actually not. Too much of escaping and projecting. I tell myself I'm better off without this person. I tell myself it's not my fault so I don't need to feel the pain. But in reality, it hurts so bad. I don't dare to see him again. I don't even think I'll see him again. I don't want it to be like that, but it seems this is the only way.
To be continued.
